Chapter 2

"Clara, that thing you asked me to look into..."

She hesitated. "I called in a favor, but all I could access was the registration info. Privacy laws are strict. Couldn't get the full file."

"It's fine," I said. "Whatever you found."

Two seconds of silence.

"The woman registered as Alistair's legal spouse... it's Sienna. Sienna Reed."

I held the phone. Said nothing.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm great," I said. "Thanks."

I hung up. The light turned green.

The crowd moved. Bodies brushed past me on both sides, one wave after another, and I just stood there. Rooted to the concrete like something left behind at the curb.

Across the street, sunlight hit the glass of a high-rise and bounced back so bright it burned.

Sienna.

Sienna Vance.

His real family had been right next to him this whole time.

I stood on the sidewalk and laughed.

For three years I'd been killing myself trying to prove I was worth something, refusing to settle for housewife. And the whole time, I'd missed what was right in front of me.

Like how every weekend he said the department needed him. Gone the whole day.

When I asked what it was about, it was always the same: "You wouldn't understand even if I told you."

Like the time he forgot a file and I dropped it off at his campus office. Two toothbrushes sitting on the bathroom counter. One blue, one pink.

I never let myself think about it.

...

I pulled myself back and kept walking.

Two blocks, three turns, and I was at the airline counter.

Standing in line, I thought of the queue at Zurich Airport three years ago. Just as long.

But back then I was about to see the man I loved. I was so stupidly happy I didn't feel tired at all.

When Alistair spotted me at arrivals, he picked me up and spun me around.

Then a girl waved at him from behind me.

"Professor Vance! What a coincidence, Clara and I were on the same flight!"

Sienna.

Alistair smiled and took her suitcase. He turned to me like it had just slipped his mind.

"Oh, I forgot to mention. Sienna's coming on as my research assistant. She came all this way on her own. That takes guts."

Sienna gave me a sweet smile. "Clara, I hope we'll get along."

My smile stiffened for half a second. I nodded.

On the ride home, I watched them talk.

When she spoke, he tilted his head to listen.

When she pointed at the lake, he looked where she pointed.

The attention that used to be mine alone was quietly being split in two.

It stung a little.

But I was happy for him, too. Good assistants are hard to find. Having someone he trusted would make his work at ETH go smoother.

Those first months in Zurich, I tried to find work.

Everything was in German. My field was too niche, and without the language, I didn't stand a chance.

Hundreds of resumes sent. Either silence, or a one-line rejection.

I'd been top of my class my whole life. Everything had come easy. I'd never once been told no.

Every night I lay awake turning the same thought over and over. Was I just not good enough?

Eventually I swallowed my pride and went to Alistair.

After dinner one night, I sat down next to him.

Stumbled through it. "Could you maybe... ask around at ETH for me?"

"There's a spousal placement in the recruitment package, right? I was thinking, if something could be arranged..."

I couldn't finish the sentence.

I had never in my life asked anyone to pull strings for me.

It was a standard benefit, something the university offered as part of his hire. But saying it out loud made my face burn.

Like I was begging for something I didn't deserve.

"Sure," he said, not looking up from his papers. "I'll ask around."

Something in me unclenched.

That was three months ago.

When I brought it up again, he said he'd been swamped. He'd get to it.

But by then Sienna had already been working at ETH for a while. Administrative role, weekends off, solid pay.

Alistair said she got in through the normal hiring process.

I believed him.

Looking back, her qualifications didn't come close to mine.

No German. No French. Could barely order coffee without pointing at the menu.

So why did hundreds of my applications go nowhere while she walked right in?

The answer had been sitting in front of me the whole time. I just refused to look at it.